DUMB CELEBRITY JOKES

What did Haley Joel Osment find on the top of Mt. Everest?
Icey dead people

Why did McCauley Culkin get married?
He was tired of being home alone.

What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite web site?
Alta Vista baby.

What does Hannibal Lecter call Britney Spears?
Dinner at Hooters!

Did you hear about Woody Allen's latest movie?
It's called "Honey, I Married the Kids"

What dessert doesn't Puff Daddy like any more?
J-Lo! (Jello)

Have you heard about the Sharon Stone virus?
It makes a huge initial impact, then you forget it's there.

...or how about the Mike Tyson virus?
It quits after one byte!

Why did Harry Potter have to retake his first year at Hogwarts?
Because he couldn't spell!

Did you know James T Kirk had 3 ears?
His left ear, his right ear and his final frontier

What do you call micheal jackson walking across a zebra crossing?
Now you see him now you dont now you see him now you dont!

10 Things to do if You Meet a Celebrity

1. Pick your nose and than ask them if they would like a bite

2. Spit on their expensive outfits

3. Always call them by the nickname you gave them, so they think your
dating.

4. Have him/her sign your @$$.

5.Ask them how much there autogragh grabs on ebay.

6.Ask for there autogragh if it's over $50.

7.Stare and smile at them and thens say, "I have new underwear on."

8.Ask him/her if he/she would like to see it.

9.Scream like a little girl and then faint.

10.Tell if the most important fact you know, the gestation period of an elephant is 7 months.